Posted By: Sheri (15 DaysOfNotSmoking YES!!) on 'Humor' Title: Church Notices Date: Fri Mar 5 01:26:00 1999 > 1) Don't let worry kill you. Let the Church help. > 2) Thursday night-Potluck Supper. Prayer and medication to follow. > 3) Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and > community. > 4) For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a > nursery downstairs. > 5) The rosebud on the altar this morning is to announce the birth of > David Alan Belzer, the sin of Rev. and Mrs. Julius Belzer. > 6) This afternoon there will be a meeting in the south and north > ends of > the church. Children will be baptised at both ends. > 7) Tuesday at 4PM there will be an ice cream social. All ladies > giving > milk will please come early. > 8) Wednesday, the Ladies Liturgy Society will meet. Mrs. Jones will > sing > "Put Me In My Little Bed" accompanied by the pastor. > 9) Thursday at 5PM there will be a meeting of the Little Mothers > Club. > All wishing to become Little Mothers, please see the minister in his > private study. > 10) This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Lewis to come forward > and > lay an egg on the altar. > 11) The service will close with "Little Drops of Water". One of the > ladies will start (quietly) and the rest of the congregation will join > in. > 12) Next Sunday, a special collection will be taken to defray the > cost of > the new carpet. All those wishing to do something on the new carpet > will > come forward and get a piece of paper. > 13) The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind and > they > may be seen in the church basement Friday. > 14) A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. > Music will follow. > 15) At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What is > Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practice. > 16) Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian > Church. > Please use large double door at the side entrance. > 17) The 1991 Spring Council Retreat will be hell May 10 and 11. > 18) Pastor is on vacation. Massages can be given to church > secretary. > 19) 8 new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of > several > new members and to the deterioration of some older ones. > 20) Mrs. Johnson will be entering the hospital this week for testes. > 21) The Senior Choir invites any member of the congregation who > enjoys > sinning to join the choir. > 22) Please join us as we show our support for Amy and Alan who is > preparing for the girth of their first child. > 23) Scouts are saving aluminium cans, bottles, and other items to be > recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children. > 24) The Lutheran Men's group will meet at 6 PM. Steak, mashed > potatoes, > green beans, bread and dessert will be served for a nominal feel. > 25) The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new tithing campaign > slogan last Sunday: "I Upped My Pledge -- Up Yours."